Kung-fu Cantona bidding for French presidency
Don’t worry world, erstwhile Man Utd footballer, kung-fu exponent and bad actor Eric Cantona has thrown his fedora into the ring and will run for the French presidency later this year.
His ability to control the middle ground, exhibit perfect control over a wind bag and have no earthly understanding of economics should make him an ideal candidate.
Take it away Eric: “When the seagulls follow the trawler, it’s because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea. Thank you very much.”